Time out for Inner Peace and Patience

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A few months ago, I surrendered myself to the possibility of spiritual enlightenment, for a couple of days, at least. There is this little peace oasis somewhere in the middle of nowhere, Virginia, called Yogaville.

How did I find this? Well, Groupon, of course, where else does one find odd new things to waste money on?

After Christmas, I continued my journey to restore my emotional sanity and self-confidence levels to their full capacities by focusing on achieving various my new years resolutions. One of them, is to lose weight. What a great way to get mentally and physically healthy by confining and subjecting yourself to three days of vegan food, yoga, prayer and meditation? Sounds, great, right? Anyways, the deal was incredibly cost-effective…only about $97 for a three days all-inclusive experience.

Religion is something I’ve always struggled with. I was raised very catholic, yet I never associated with the tenets of the faith or believed in its assertions. I think organized religion is dangerous and is responsible for many of the conflicts and suffering of the world. Spirituality is inherently an individual matter. You can only believe what you believe, no one can believe it for you or force you to believe anything you don’t want to. With that said, I’ve always had a soft spot for certain aspects of Buddhism. I’ve read various books on the matter and as you’ve seen in my earlier posts, I do love Yoga. So, I thought I’d push my own theological limits a bit and step out of my comfort zone to check out what this Yogaville was all about.

As soon as I arrived to the compound, or well, Ashram as it is actually called, I was scared shit-less. It was pouring rain, I was already hungry and worst of all, I was all alone. Or so I thought.

I immediately went to my dorm room to find a woman senior to me making up her space on her bunk bed across the room. It seems like we became instant friends. She had been there before and kindly offered to share her experience and some tips for survival with me. Later on this would include the bartering of snacks, such as a Saudi biscuit a friend had given me that I was not interested in, for some cheez-its and other snacks she was kind to give me.

The food was generally good but, nonetheless I was craving cheese, fish, sugar and whatever else we were not permitted. I owe so much to her for coming to my rescue, haha.

I met another lady there who became my friend as well and was, like me, hesitated before coming and was well out of her comfort zone. One of the nights, despite it pouring rain outside, this other lady, we’ll call her Iris, went to visit the Interfaith Shrine with me. Iris even let me borrow one of her umbrellas so I did not get completely soaked (although I think we both got soaked anyways haha). That is what the picture is above. The shrine finds a commonality between all major world religions and illustrates this physically. Inside, there is various tubing filled with light that runs through each religion and joins together at the top of the domed-ceiling. It is quite breathtaking.

Throughout the rest of the long weekend, I tried Laugh yoga, hatha yoga (different from anything I had experienced before), lentil soup (never doing that again), deligious vegan donuts, and talking to new and different people I might have beforehand misjudged and avoided. I learned some meditation techniques and practiced patience and slowing down my mind when usually, I can’t stop thinking and just want to keep moving.

The last day, we did another round of Hatha yoga and as we opened our eyes and started to get up out of shavasinah, it had started to snow outside, so we rose facing the window, watching the snow fall down. It was an experience impossible to be described with words.

I think I have a greater tolerance for religion after that experience. I also am even more of a believer that friendship can spring from any source.

Om.

Dating Downfalls

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I have gone on several dates lately. Most of them good, but the last couple….pretty bad. The above ending to one tonight literally made Joey (when I shared it with her) and me laugh outloud. This guy was so extremely boring during the whole date. Whatever I was interested, he enjoyed the opposite. It was torturous. I finally thought we were ending the night on a good positive note when I said goodbye to him at his car. He asked then if I needed company while I pack for a trip tomorrow, and I politely declined. You can see in the subsequent messages that I failed to clearly communicate my message, that I was not interested.

Last weekend, I went on a couple promising dates with someone. But then, we finally go to the point, third date, where I felt comfortable broaching the kiss barrier. So we kissed. Bad idea.

I have never experienced this before, but this guy refused to use either his tongue or his lips when kissing. He literally like sucked his lips in when he tried to kiss me. That doesn’t work. In fact, that does the opposite of work. I seriously tried my hardest to make it work and establish some connection. But these efforts failed miserably. I then attempted to discuss the predicament with him and he goes: “Oh, I don’t do tongue-kissing”. And he didn’t understand what it meant to use your lips. He also proceeded to call my style of kissing, “barbaric”. Yeah. So much for my all-star track record of impeccable kissing abilities. So I left and that was that.

Despite these experiences, I have had mostly pleasant and enlightening experiences dating lately. I’ve also been able to maintain my confidence level and not succumb to bad dating decisions. I like my rule of no kissing on the first date too. Highly recommend that.

I’m off to Boston tomorrow for my 10-year high-school reunion and my friend’s baby shower. Wish me luck for both, I’ll need it! :-)

The Feminist Paradox

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As a woman in America, I am free to do many things. For example, figure out how to make milk and cookie shots (pictured above) for Joey’s recent birthday.

Other women, like those who I had the pleasure and honor meeting on Halloween, decided to pursue their passions and embark on challenging careers such as doctors, psychologists and surgeons. The idea of becoming these these things is super appealing and empowering to me. Like, how great is it here in this country where really, you can be whatever you want to be if you work hard enough at it (most of the time). I was very excited to talk to this group of women.

It was then that I learned, once again, that all that glitters isn’t gold. Although these women were living their passions, something is still missing, Not one of these women (out of like 5) had significant others. These women also happened to be of Asian descent. It was then explained to me that they all had equally of hard of a time meeting men of Asian descent. It turns out that, at least in this area, there aren’t a lot of Asian men, in both the ethnic and cultural sense, who desire strong, independent women passionate about their careers. Apparently, in their culture, womens’ roles were still quite constrained in the familial sense. Therefore, these women sacrificed love for purpose. This makes me sad.

It is like, on one hand, living your dream career seems such an incredible ubiquitous desire. But the on the other hand, what is life without love? Can women really truly have both in any country? I strongly envied these women I met and talked to, until I learned about all their sacrifices. One of the women witnessed at least 5 of her close friends and classmates in med school commit suicide because it was so difficult. I can’t even imagine what that would be like. The dedication and perseverance is really commendable.

I wouldn’t have it any other way but perhaps freedom and female empowerment is both a blessing and a curse.

I hope for anyone reading this, and my future self that we can achieve both love, and a life of individual purpose.

Ecosystem

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Normally, I would report that as of today I have 47 days left of the challenge to go. However, a few days ago I took an emotional inventory of myself and decided to mindfully curtail the challenge and engage in intimacy.

I feel at this point that I’ve emotionally accomplished what I set out to do with this challenge; doing so just happened to take less than 90 days. However, in engaging in regular self-exploration and introspection, I learned everything I needed to strengthen my self-confidence and decrease my emotional dependency on other people.

Below are the results and my current state of mind:

  1. No longer obsessed with texting and checking my phone every few minutes (thank god).
  2. Comfortable (for reasonable periods of time/ a few nights per week) being by myself and alone in my own bed.
  3. Less anxious; Centered and mindful of the present moment aware that all moments both good and bad quickly pass by (aka not stressing as much because whatever the cause of the stress…is bound to soon pass and life moves on).
  4. Understanding of my own attachment-style and attachment needs and accepting that everyone has their own different style and needs and acts accordingly. Knowledgeable of what signs to look for in potential partners of the secure-attachment style.
  5. Not burdened by constant thoughts or worries of past romances.
  6. Putting myself first including my goals and daily aspirations. Plans with others comes second to my needs, not first.
  7. Happier
  8. Able to have an intimate encounter and be able to temper my emotions and not automatically become hung up or preoccupied with the person after.

I consider this challenge only half over. Although I’m no longer constricting myself to complete celibacy, I am now focused on my physical well-being and getting my body into the best shape it can be and therefore am not yet ready to pursue dating. So, this is how I intend to use the rest of the 47 days. Also, I have completed my nutrition coursework at the Health Sciences Academy and gained certification as a Nutritional Therapist. I’ve already started providing guidance and support to people seeking nutrition care and it feels great! Nutrition is truly a passion of mine so I’m very excited to have this credential under my belt and happy to share what I know with any of you! Just send me an e-mail and we can get started!

In a sense, I feel like I’ve created and cultivated my own emotional ecosystem, similar to the photo at the start of the post. In the photo, there are 4 tiny shrimp in a glass sphere. There is air for oxygen, water for hydration and plant life for sustenance. Everything in the sphere works together in a self-sustaining cycle to provide the required living conditions for the shrimp. It feels like I have an equivalent of this for my mind.

I will continue to post on topics of emotional attachment and self-confidence and I hope that you will stay tuned! To all of my friends: thank you for your support and encouragement over the past month and a half! I couldn’t have transformed without you :-).

AcroYoga

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I did AcroYoga with Joey and Gameboy last night. It was super fun and the people were friendly and inclusive.

This is an example of one of the many times where beforehand I was dreading the event and considered cancelling but I pushed myself to, like Nike says, Just Do It.

I might have said this before but its so true, if you have some sort of event planned and you don’t feel like going, just do it anyways because the truth is, more than likely, you’ll end up having a great time, even if at the moment you feel too tired/lazy/not in the mood. Its a good rule of thumb: don’t feel like going? Just do it, odds are, you’ll be glad you did.

So, time to take stock in how things are going. If you recall, I added some new parameters over the course of this challenge, such as reserving two nights a week for “me time”. Since then, I’ve been able to stick to that and actually look forward to it. Tonight for example, my inclination was to secure some sort of plans since, well, it is a Saturday night! But, I didn’t and am just fine. Also, on top of the acroyoga last night, I did Pilates this morning and ache from head to toe, so I can’t move anyways.

I have started trying to concentrate on improving my physical attributes too, but just barely. For every two nutrient-deficient and crap meals I probably have one nutrient-filled healthy meals. So…there is room for improvement there but 1/3 is a good start.

My stress-levels continue to be in check using some of the techniques I described in previous postings. As a result, I’ve been sleeping really well most nights. In fact…sleep sounds like a great idea right now.

Dulces Suenos!

ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

The Independence Delusion

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Faye

“Miss Independent”

Yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah

[Verse 1]
Ooh there’s somethin about just somethin about the way she’s move
And I can’t figure it out
there’s something about her.
Said ooh it’s somethin about kinda woman that want you but don’t need you
And I can’t figure it out
it’s somethin about her
Cause she walk like a boss talk like a boss
Manicured nailed to set the pedicure off
She’s fly effortlessly
Cause she move like a boss do what a boss
Do she got me thinkin about gettin involved
That’s the kinda girl I need

[Chorus]
She got her own thing
that’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Won’t you come and spend a little time
She got her own thing that’s why I love her
Miss Independent
ooh the way you shine
Miss Independent
yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah

[Verse 2]
Ooh there’s somethin about
kinda woman that can do for herself
I look at her and it makes me proud
There’s something about her
Somethin oh so sexy about
kinda woman that don’t even need my help
She said she got it she got it
No doubt, it’s somethin about her
Cause she work like a boss play like a boss
Car and a crib she bouta pay em both off
And the bills are paid on time yeah
She made for a boss only a boss
Anything less she telling them to get lost
That’s the girl that’s on my mind

[Chorus]

[Bridge]
Her favorite thing to say Don’t worry I got it
And everything she got best believe she bought it
She gonna steal ma heart ain’t no doubt about it
You’re everything I need, said you’re everything I need
yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah

[Chorus]

Miss Independent
That’s why I love her

_______________________________________________________________
I’ve learned quite a lot about independence, dependency, attachment and detachment since I embarked upon this challenge. The truth is that in starting this, I had fallen into a pitfall disguised as what I had taken to be common sense. I genuinely thought I’ve simply become too needy of a person and that I had to go through a detox to fix myself and emerge as a wholly self-sufficient individual, mentally and physically. In hindsight, my premise was fundamentally erroneous.
There is a lot out there, catchy songs (like the one above), superheroes, commercials, etc that convey the impression that independence is strong, powerful and attractive. In beginning this challenge, I was pursuing emotional independence. For the short-term, that is a healthy thing for sure. However, It turns out that, long-term, perpetual, indefinite emotional independence is not in anyone’s best interest. Before doing this, I thought it would be great if I could avoid human intimacy for as long as possible but I know myself and knew that even three months would be a lofty goal, so I stuck to that and it continues to be a challenge I could fail at any day now. From all I’ve learned thus far, its a good thing I didn’t set my sights on a longer-term hiatus.
In reading, “Attached”, I was shocked at how it completely dismantled the notion I had come to believe so strongly which is that independence and the ability to detach emotionally when necessary is essential for emotional sanity and happiness. Apparently, I wasn’t the only one who had been deceived by the signs around me.
The book points out that many people believe this fallacy and idealize a life of self-sufficiency and look down upon dependency. However, as is demonstrated in many real-life examples, no one is actually happy alone for a long time. It uses the true story adapted and made famous by the movie Into the Wild. SPOILER ALERT – IF YOU PLAN ON OR WANT TO SEE THE MOVIE, STOP READING. In this case, the guy, Chris, leaves everything behind and embarks on a solo journey through the wilderness. Long story short, he ended up starving to death alone and in the last entry of his journal he wrote: “Happiness is only real when shared”.
Ultimately the book’s biggest assertion is that we are our best selves and our happiest when we are in a mutually-satisfactory and meaningful relationship with someone and on the converse, we are at our worst when we are stuck in unhealthy and destructive relationships. However, it doesn’t really go much beyond this to point out what happens between point A and point B, which is where I think there needs to be some breathing room and a concerted effort put forth on self-discovery. It kind of leaves you with the impression that you go from a bad relationship to a good relationship (based on your attachment needs) in a vacuum.
I discussed this conundrum with my amazing therapist, Faye, and she had the perfect explanation and illustration to share with me. Now, scroll up and take a look at the drawing included at the beginning of the post.
Faye drew a version of this with pen and paper during our session together. Her belief is that we each are individual trees, strengthened by the roots we grow and the deeper the roots, the stronger and more durable the trees become. Then, when one tree grows alongside another tree, with its own roots, a common marsh or intertwining of branches up top develops and in the middle emerges breeding ground for their life together with pets, kids, hobbies or what have you. However, if you were to cut the picture down the middle, neither tree would shrivel up and die, because it is sustained by its own roots.
I love that and think it brings everything together beautifully.
I think the woman described in Ne-Yo’s song is admirable, but, its an impossible ideal for me. “Car and a crib she bouta pay em both off” ??. Good for her but the only way I’m paying off both a house and a car is if I win the lottery….
So, forget that and for now, and for the next 55 days, I’m continuing to cultivate and expand my own roots.

Stress Management

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Nadia missed me :-)

Before I left for my trip to Europe, I did a ridiculous amount of yoga, as you’re probably aware from reading my past posts. I realized after doing so much yoga and meditation that declining or turning down romantic requests is a lot like meditation.

For example, when we meditate, we focus internally on sensations of the body and our breathing. However, it is normal every few breaths or so to have our minds start to wander or have random thoughts enter the picture. The key to dealing with these is just to notice them, but not to judge or try to change them. The response is to pause, notice what they are saying, watch them pass, and return the focus to the internal sensations of the body.

I used to find it very difficult to decline offers from people I’m sexually attracted to or interested in. However, I’ve been able to sort of apply this meditative practice to situations where someone is indicating they’d like something to happen sexually with me. The more I say no, the easier it becomes to do so. At this point, its sort of just like meditation. Someone texts or makes an offer and I acknowledge it, politely decline, and go on with my day. This seems like pretty good progress!

Thanks to all that yoga and meditation work, along with travelling with such a calm cool collected person like Capricorn, I’ve noticed that my stress level is virtually a zero.

Every time some instance of uncertainty fell upon us overseas, Capricorn had this unconcerned stable nature about her that seriously whatever is meant to be will be and everything will work out. No matter what, there was no reason to worry. She was right, everything did work out just fine, and after awhile I began to emulate that disposition myself. Even when we were running super late for our flight, she was perfectly fine and trusted that if we do our best and just don’t make it, its happening for a reason so just trust and let it be.

Work was pretty fast-paced and stressful today but, I didn’t let it get to me, just did everything the best I could and breathed through the day.

I really hope I can continue this behavior.

When I was in college I was diagnosed with ADHD. However, to this day I’m not actually sure if I ever truly had that or not. Sure, its super difficult for me to concentrate when in school or class but I think my very poor diet had a big influence on that as a teenager and young adult. I used to depend on adderall to get me through assignments and classes but eventually I found this book that I still reference as a tool for managing my concentration issues.

It’s called “Change Your Brain, Change Your Life”. I know, I know, it sounds super corny and cheesy but…it works. I still see a lot of my friends on adderall and related medications and I strongly think they are more harmful than helpful in the long-term. If you are one of those people…I urge you to at least check out this book and some of the natural remedies it offers.

For example, “Low norepinephrine and dopamine levels are often associated with depression, lethargy, trouble focusing, negativity and mental fuzziness. To enhance norepinephrine and dopamine levels, it is better to have protein snacks (meat, eggs, or cheese) and to avoid simple carbohydrates, such as bread, pasta, cakes, and candy. Also, I often have my patients take natural amino acids for energy, focus and impulsivity control.”

There is even a TED talk on major tenets of the book which you can watch by clicking on this text.

Thanks to my friend Gameboy, who was the one who had recommended that I read “Attached”, I’ve realized that I’d really like to inspire people as a life goal. He said the other day that this challenge has inspired him. That made it click for me that what I want to do most with whatever eventual career I land on or hobby I undertake, is to inspire as many people as possible. I’ll look to head in that direction after this is over and I transition back to my nutrition therapy work.

Buenas noches a todos!

London and Paris – An Experiment in Human Interaction

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Sorry it has been awhile! I came back from my trip with Capricorn a couple days ago and have basically been sleeping ever since…

Our trip to London, Paris, Bath and Stonehenge provided a very interesting experience in human interaction. In London, the people were incredibly kind. Not just a few people, everyone we encountered went out of their way to help us or to just be friendly and make us feel welcomed.

First, there was Freddie, a host at this new restaurant by Kings Cross who came outside of the restaurant where Capricorn and I were reviewing the menu and pondering if we wanted to go inside or not to greet us, get to know us, take us around the restaurant, give us recommendations of things to do and just genuinely make us feel at home. He also took my hand and held it as we said goodbye after dinner and were leaving the restaurant. He was gorgeous and I’m pretty sure if he asked me to marry him right then and there…I would have obliged despite this challenge and having 58 days of it left.

Then, there were random people along the street, at least 6 of them, who would come right up to us after seeing expressions of confusion and anxiety of our faces clearly reflecting that we were lost. They very kindly asked us where we were trying to go and gladly did their best to guide us back on track. Unfortunately, most of the time their directions were completely wrong, but! They tried and were super sweet to at least offer to help.

In addition to people reaching out to us after realizing we were in distress, there didn’t seem to be any class distinctions in London. Meaning that everyone of all social statuses, demographics, heritage and whatever other social distinction, socialized and integrated with each other as if no one person was any different from another. For example, we saw some homeless people up and dancing with random passerbys on the sidewalk in Camden Town. We also saw this one homeless guy with a dog all of a sudden be joined by a young guy walking on the sidewalk who randomly decided to join the homeless guy, share his meal and sit with him and the dog who he greeted kindly and affectionately. This was a truly beautiful thing to witness and it revealed something now seemingly strange about the United States: why do groups of similar backgrounds and social statuses here tend to stay together and not mingle with others most of the time? I think one thing could be that here in the U.S. we have more language barriers than in London but it perplexes and makes me a bit sad now. We have a tendency here to avoid “strangers” as if everyone we don’t know is a threat to our personal security. London did not reflect this mentality whatsoever. Everyone had no problem talking to everyone else and it was like they were their own vast support system.

Paris….is a different story. People there seriously went out of their way to be rude to us. It was so astonishing that Capricorn and I literally looked at each other and just had to laugh after about the tenth instance of unprovoked rudeness. Here are a couple of examples. First, the Big Bus driver would pull over, open both the bus doors and then scream at people not to enter the first door but go through the back door (which was confusing since they were both open…). Then, when we entered the bus, we glanced up and caught his eyes looking in his rear-view mirror. He immediately flipped up the mirror so that we could no longer see him and grunted. The next Big Bus driver did just the opposite. He yelled at people to come through the front doors only. It was wildly confusing.

In the Louvre, Capricorn and I were walking down the stairs and agreed to go to the right to the next exhibit. Some random guy also on the stairs decided to turn to us and angrily said “SHHHH YOU ARE IN THE LOUVRE!” After we weren’t even loud or anything. In fact, I’m not sure how he even heard us above everyone else chatting on the stairs.

Capricorn and I got very lost navigating the streets of Paris. None of the streets seemed to be marked and the maps we were given were completely inaccurate. People would see us looking lost and instead of offering any assistance would mutter something in French indicating they were annoyed and would brush past or cut in front of us with attitude.

Also, why in the world is Paris known for being some sort of a City of Love? Everywhere we turned we saw single, unhappy chain-smokers. I think we only saw two happy couples during the entire time we were there.

People at Bath and Stonehenge that we met were super sweet. We ate lunch with this German Couple from Nuremberg? I could be spelling that wrong. They were so nice though and openly talked to us about the immigration crisis that is happening in Europe right now, particularly in Germany.

Lesson from all this being that, as a society, we benefit more from opening up to one another and reaching out more to those we pass by, than we benefit by not doing so.

One of the coolest parts of the trip was that I whipped out my 5-year Latin education and spoke it with a “Roman Soldier” at Bath. So cool and I love that I can just walk up to whoever in whatever language I’m comfortable with and start a conversation.

I did learn one thing though about myself and something that might need to change as I re-enter the dating scene in less than two months. Apparently, my comfy winter boots are not appropriate going-out attire on a Saturday night. Capricorn informed me that a very attractive guy was checking me out but became appalled when his view fell upon my boots and quickly turned back around and forgot that I even existed. Whoops. They were so comfy though! Sigh. I’ll have to think about this a bit more as I don’t really believe in the utility of high-heels but there must be some compromise.

I will leave you now with a Latin Motto that I picked up in Bath for you to ponder…

UMBRA ES AMANTIS MAGIS QUAM AMATOR

Walk Slowly into the Mystery

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Looking ahead, I’m trying to decide what type of relationship has the best chance of success, is the happiest and has the most longevity. Is it a monogamous one? Is it an open-relationship? Combination of the two?

Given my attachment style and personality, I’m leaning towards monogamous but then what do you do to prevent the relationship from inevitably becoming stale? How do you preserve trust and explore curiosity at the same time? I’m not really sure so I’d like this to be a conversation.

Therefore, go ahead and comment on your experiences and which relationship format, or, a new one that you can think of works the best.

Also, I’ll be on travel for the next several days so now is your time to catch up on previous posts that you may have missed!

66 to go!

Caring is Sharing

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And the journey to figure out myself as best I can continues.

One of the ways I’d like to understand myself better is sexual attraction-wise. I know I like guys, a lot, 100% huge fan in every way. But, I find the idea of being open to experiences with both genders appealing as well. Also, there is a lot of hot girls out there in the world and I admire them/would totally make out with them such as Rachel MacAdams and Scarlett Johansson. Therefore, celebrities aside, from the waist up I think I’m pretty attracted to certain others of my same gender. But what does this mean? I’ve never really figured out a good conclusion to this conundrum. Too many variables making it impossible for me to fit neatly inside any one box.

Until, last night during a discussion with Hot Dog’s friend, Hammock.

Hammock explained to me the Kinsey scale. Remarkably and a little embarrassingly, I’d never heard of this sexuality measurement tool before. It’s really cool! Basically, it is sexual attraction on a scale of zero to six. Zero is 100% heterosexual and 6 is 100% homosexual. I honestly do believe that sexual attraction is based in genetics. In discussing this at length with a homosexual friend of mine the other week, it became even more evidently so when he explained to me several scientists who have already explored the connection. Therefore, it is no different from having a genetic proclivity towards anything else such as having a high metabolism or a receding hair line. It is just simply who you are and you can ignore it or you can figure it out and accept it.

Anyways, I took this test that places you somewhere on the Kinsey scale. You can take it too at: http://vistriai.com/kinseyscaletest/. I loved this test because I thought the questions were unbiased and logical. It placed me at a 2 and I’ve included a screen shot of what that means at the beginning of this post. To be ranked as a 2 it means: Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual. I think that sums it up perfectly. To be ranked as a 3 means: equally heterosexual and homosexual, which I take to simply mean “bisexual”. So being considered a 2 makes sense, I’m not quite bisexual but not entirely heterosexual either. Perfect, glad we figured that out. However, Hammock did not like this particular test because apparently it gave him an inconclusive test result, even after retaking it several times. If this happens to you, just google around and I’m sure there are many other free and quick tests out there. I took a difference test and it placed me at a 1. But I prefer 2. The number 2 is actually my favorite number.

Below is the full Kinsey scale for your awareness:

0 Exclusively heterosexual.
1 Predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual.
2 Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual.
3 Equally heterosexual and homosexual.
4 Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual.
5 Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual.
6 Exclusively homosexual.
X Non-sexual.
F The test failed to match you to a Kinsey Type profile. Either you answered some questions wrong, or you are a very unusual person.

This reminds me that my subscription to the magazine Psychology Today has expired and I need to renew it. If you’re into psychology topics like I am, I highly suggest you check out that magazine. Really intriguing and useful stuff.

That’s all for now, thanks for sticking with me!

67. That isn’t a bad age by the way. Hopefully we’ll all be 67, happy and healthy one day, with everything about ourselves fully figured out and accepted :-)